She's like the wind. . .

Or at least a light breeze.  I started running again.  For realz, as Ben would say.  Actual one foot in front of the other, pounding on pavement, wearing tights kinda running.  I know - scary!

It's been a while since I last hit the road.  I first started running when we moved here from Alberta.  I was still in the honeymoon phase of loving the rainy ( not snowy) winter and figured, why not start running?  It helped that I was a stay at home mom to four kids 7 and under and knew almost no one.  It was a social thing.  A prevent me from becoming a sociopath thing.  So I started running by joining a TC10K clinic.

I discovered I kinda liked the whole running thing.  I liked how it made me feel, how I could just think, and run and ache and no one bugged me.  I loved how, well, FREE I felt.  It was fun. 

So I kept running for about 2 years, until my running partners got pregnant and had kids of their own, and I started working outside the home and we somehow all got busy and stopped running.  But I secretly missed it - even as my weight ballooned and the thought of putting on my shoes and hitting the trails seemed like a distant memory.

I am running again.  It's harder this time - I am 8 years older, heavier, and I have a bit of an attitude ( I know - hard to believe, right???!!!)  In my head, I am a runner - my body begs to differ.

I am pretty sure there is nothing quite so unattractive as an, ahem - "woman of substance" in running tights looking like she is trying to catch up with the ice cream truck that left her behind.  Hair wet with sweat ( like a rainstorm that hit only me), red faced and probably about to have a heart attack ( I'm not, really, I am just fine!), jiggling and bouncing along ( yes, I spent the money on a big girl bra - Oprah was right - it was worth every penny)  I am not as graceful, or as pretty or as powerful as most of the runners out there.  And frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.

When I hit the trail for the first time in a very long time, it felt, well, pretty great.  I remembered that sense of freedom and play and joy, and even though my muscles screamed in agony with pretty much every step, I remembered why I liked it.  And even when I got home and later in the day could hardly move from the agony of using muscles that hadn't been used in that way for a long time, I still remembered why I like it.  My hips hurt, my knees ached, my quads complained - a lot.  But it wasn't as bad as when I started before.  My fitness has improved - I don't huff and puff as much as I did just a few months ago, and I am recovering pretty quickly - my muscles must be remembering, too.  That is a good thing, because I have a feeling they are about to get quite a workout over the next few months.

I will definitely have a 10K in my future, and I am even looking down the road at, dare I say it out loud - a half marathon.  Now that is a scary goal. I have wanted to do one for a really long time, but I never until now believed that it may actually be possible.  Now I believe.  So I guess it is about time I did it.  For realz.